Mulder: OK, Scully, I figured it out.
Scully: What did you figure out, Mulder?
Mulder: What you were talking about when you mentioned 'alien invasion' in regards to the books of Ezra and Nehemiah. Very clever: you were piquing my interest by pandering to my obsessions. In addition, you were pulling the old switcheroo.
Scully: Please explain to me the scientific nature of the 'switcheroo.'
Mulder: The text presents it as the return of the true Israel to Jerusalem from Exile--but you're hinting that the people living in Judah might actually have seen it as an invasion by a group of aliens.
Scully: It's an interesting thought experiment, Mulder: when you read the text of Ezra-Nehemiah, with which group do you identify?
Mulder: Do you even have to ask? I'm an American, Scully, and the mere thought of those elites with their fancy Persian ways coming into my land and telling me who I can and can't marry makes my red white and blue blood boil. I don't care who their grandfathers were, I don't care if they've got a charter from the Persian ruler, authentic vessels from Solomon's temple, and the 10 commandments in the original packaging: don't tread on me! No taxation without representation! And if a a Moabite wife is good enough for King David, it's good enough for me!
Scully: Ruth was King David's great-grandmother, Mulder, not his wife.
Mulder: Tyranny, Scully! Government elites hatching a conspiracy to force men to divorce their wives and send their children away!
Scully: Your righteous indignation on behalf of the wives and children does you credit. But can't you summon up that fertile Mulderean imagination and think about the matter from the point of view of the returnees?
Mulder: I'd rather not, Scully. You know how much I enjoy my righteous indignation.
Scully: Which makes you not unlike Ezra and Nehemiah.
Mulder: I suppose an argument could be made that the returnees were an endangered species. If they didn't draw the line at something as fundamental as marriage and the raising of children, they might have found themselves back at square one, worshipping a whole pantheon of Canaanite and Moabite gods. As Nehemiah says, there was the issue of the children not learning the language of Judah, those precious words of the law and the prophets. And then, these returnees came from people who had stood out against worshipping the Persian gods. The fact that the prayers of their parents and grandparents had been answered, and they were now back in Jerusalem, must have made them feel that their God, Yahweh, had a power that it would be dangerous not to acknowledge.
Scully: Those do sound like plausible reasons, Mulder. I admire your ability to put yourself in the place of these men.
Mulder: Plus they were probably sick of their wives anyway.
Scully: Mulder...
Mulder: They probably all just got together and said, "Hey, let's get new wives. Really hot new wives."
Scully: Mulder...
Mulder: It was the New Wives Club. But, Scully, put yourself in the place of those new wives. Do you think they ever really trusted their husbands? Do you think they thought, How soon until these guys find another document in the temple that says, all the priests get new wives? How soon until there's another commission that investigates us, and decides we're not Yahweh-approved? If you'd been one of those wives, Scully, what would you have done?
Scully: I suppose I'd have fired up the oven and started baking cakes to the Queen of Heaven.
Mulder: That's right. Queen of Heaven, baby!
Scully: Asherah.
Mulder: What did you call me, Scully?
Scully: Asherah is one of the names of the Queen of Heaven.
Mulder: I think a man should always be loyal to his partner, Scully. Even if she doesn't worship at the same altar or speak quite the same language.
Scully: And she should be loyal to him, even if he does sometimes become awash in self-righteousness...But Mulder, I think your assumptions about the lack of hotness of Moabite wives may not be supported by the texts.
Mulder: Are you telling me there may be biblical warrants for the hotness of Moabite women, Scully? Do you suggest more careful investigation into the biblical narratives?
Scully: The truth is in there, Mulder.
Per usual, another wonderful post, Char! I do take a small issue with Mulder's patriotism - do you read his passion for his work as an implicit acknowledgment of American greatness and thus the reason for his die-hard mentality and take-no-prisoners approach to FBI field work? All of his words, after all, seem to track closely to a very skeptical outlook on both the government but also the nation itself. Just wondering!
ReplyDeleteIn mentioning how the returnees "stood out against worshipping the Persian gods," you got me thinking. A couple sentences before you seem to suggest that they likely were worshipping these gods. And, in fact, reading Lisbeth Fried's article on messiah at this time, there is a strong case to be made that both priests and people had ascribed religious/theological meaning on Cyrus' victory; calling him "messiah" had theological meaning because it would have made sense that he had the Persian and Babylonian (if not Judean!) gods on his side to be as victorious as he was. So maybe these returnees weren't as ideologically pure as you make them out to be. I wonder what returning home to a restoration-minded homeland would have been like, then: a sort of "Get in line" or go back to Babylonia, is my guess. That would have been hard to keep switching back and forth - but maybe my estimation doesn't given them enough credit; I'm sure many did hew to the identity of only one God, Yhwh.
Anyway, great post; very good thinking!
As per usual, this was hilarious. You touched on a couple things that rang true for me. Firstly, the reference to Mulder being an American had me laughing and was also slightly painful. The viewpoint you present, one that lacks acceptance of other cultures, is being played out on the national stage in the 2016 election. What a creative and effective way to point that out!
ReplyDeleteSecondly, good for you for thinking through the emotional implications of the narrative! When the Jews divorced their wives and took Jewish wives…how hard that must have been! Families torn apart! Loving relationships cast aside! And for what? Adherence to the law of God. Does a similar thing happen today, I wonder, in conservative Christianity?
Thanks for your clever post! Looking forward to the Deuteronomistic literature!